Salamander Eyes
by Timey Wimey Nonsense
Summary: They reminded Newt of the eyes of a salamander; the eyes of a brilliant and fierce creature that rose from the embers of a fire left to burn too long. Eyes like burning flames, dancing around a dark pool of water. Somehow, wonderfully, Tina had that same salamander fire in her eyes. An insight into Newt's mind during that iconic scene with Tina in CoG.


A witch and wizard on a mission, Newt Scamander and Tina Goldstein strolled into the archive room of French Ministry of Magic, doing their best impression of law-abiding citizens who most certainly belonged there. The exhilaration of the previous moment had begun to wear off, and the easy laughter that had come from their encounter with Theseus had been replaced by a cool and professional silence. The silence was far too cool and professional for Newt's liking. He found himself wondering where it all went wrong.

Tina had taken no prompting when it came to unceremoniously bucking Theseus down into a chair with a flick of her wand, and the way she sent his brother spinning helplessly off into the distance was, quite frankly, one of the best moments of Newt's life. For a moment, all of the awkwardness of their Paris encounters had melted off, and it felt just like it had a year ago in New York.

At the thought of that city, Newt couldn't help but reminisce on the trip that changed his life. It was never supposed to be an eventful trip. He had only meant to pass through on his way to Arizona. But when his case was accidentally unlocked and his creatures set free, he had no choice but to stay. And from there, his life changed forever.

At first, Tina had just been a run-of-the-mill Ministry witch, albeit with a bit of mustard on her face, which he hadn't hesitated to point out. At that point, he had been preoccupied by getting his case back and avoiding being arrested. But he had quickly discovered that she had so much more heart than the usual Ministries lackeys. In hindsight, he couldn't imagine many ministry employees would take it into their hands and bring a potential criminal and an injured muggle into their house for the night.

For a long time, he thought that he hated ministry employees. As it turns out, he just hadn't met the right one.

Newt had often thought of Tina over the past year. He thought not only of their time together in New York, but he also found himself wondering what she would say if she was beside him. Echoes of Tina would always surface at the most peculiar times, and sometimes he would almost turn to say a word to empty air.

Newt had thought a lot about what would happen when they reunited. Many of them involved Newt somehow possessing a much surer tongue, and much better behaved creatures. Newt wasn't skilled with identifying emotions (human ones, anyway), but even he could not help but notice the tension in the air when the event finally occurred.

Granted, it hadn't been the most ideal of circumstances in which to reunite. There hadn't been a lot of time for friendly interaction, but what pained Newt is that even in the brief moments that weren't taken up by finding Credence, Tina had seemed closed off.

"Mr Scamander", she had called him, like they were almost strangers. Newt couldn't quite bring himself to realise that perhaps it was always a one sided attraction, and that perhaps Newt was just not understanding people again.

Newt knew he had a tendency to annoy people, and it would break his heart if he learnt that Tina was only ever putting up with him for the sake of her auror work.

They seemed to have parted on good terms. Tina even offered to personally see Newt off at the docks, which delighted him immensely. While he was sad to part with Queenie and Jacob, he couldn't help but be delighted that he would get to say goodbye to Tina in private. He hated saying goodbye to people, and it was always easier for Newt to deal with fewer people at a time.

And the goodbye seemed to go well, as far as Newt was concerned. He wished he had been a bit better at vocalising his emotions to Tina, and he did manage to blurt out a few awkward sentences that made even Newt wince - "_I can't think of anyone else I'd rather have investigating me"-_ but saying strange things wasn't anything new for him. Overall, Newt believed it had been rather successful.

Tina had even suggested the title for his new book - Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them - and once it was vocalised, he couldn't imagine any other title. It somehow felt right - the beasts he had written about certainly were fantastic, and he couldn't think of a better adjective to describe them in a book that he hoped would be read by witches and wizards worldwide. It wasn't often that he encountered someone who seemed to understand exactly how he felt about creatures.

At one point, he wasn't sure what compelled him to do it, but Newt couldn't help but shyly reach over and brush a strand of hair back from her face. He only wanted one final glimpse at her eyes, which might have been his favourite part of her delicate face. It was never easy for Newt to look at people directly in the eye, but with Tina, Newt felt like he could make an exception. She had the most beautiful eyes Newt had ever seen.

He didn't stop thinking about these eyes, even when he was on the other side of the Atlantic. They reminded Newt of the eyes of a salamander; the eyes of a brilliant and fierce creature that rose from the embers of a fire left to burn too long. Eyes like burning flames, dancing around a dark pool of water. Somehow, wonderfully, Tina had that same salamander fire in her eyes.

At that point, he dared not hope that she might return his feelings, so he tried to leave there and then, safe in the knowledge that the farewell had been perfectly polite and appropriate for people who had only known each other for a few days.

Newt hated goodbyes.

He barely made it five steps away before hesitating, with the previous moments swirling around in his head. Was that really how he wanted to end things? Sod being polite. He may have known Tina for less than a week, but already he couldn't imagine a life without ever seeing this marvelous witch again, and if he left on that note, he didn't think he would. There was nothing to it - he needed to promise that he would come back.

With bated breath, Newt offered to bring Tina her copy of his book in person.

Tina said that she'd like that. More specifically, she said that she'd like that very much. And after she had said it, Tina's face had lit up with what must have been the most beautiful smile Newt had ever seen, and he got to leave New York with the memory of that moment, and the promise of seeing these sparkling Salamander eyes once more.

However, all of Newt's excited dreams of proudly handing Tina her own copy of his book - signed, of course - had gone out the window when he was almost immediately presented with a travel ban. They had been writing to each other, but even that fizzled out when Tina abruptly stopped replying to his letters.

Newt ruefully noted that the sudden cease of contact probably had something to do with the false declaration of his engagement in that blasted magazine. He wished he had known about that earlier. No matter how you felt about someone, it would have been quite rude to not mention your engagement to someone when you've been sending owls back and forth to them for several months.

What had Queenie said about her reaction to that article? "Tina was all in a tizzy?" Newt had been quite surprised to hear that at that at the time, and was still surprised now. He dared hope that perhaps his affection for her wasn't as one-sided as he had previously thought, but even that hope was dashed when Queenie had told him that Tina was seeing someone else. Achilles, or something. He was an auror, apparently. Tina hadn't mentioned anything about him to Newt. Perhaps they weren't friends after all.

Of course, in the end, if Tina was happy, Newt was happy.

It was bizarre really, that someone he only met for a few days had stayed in his thoughts for so long. He wouldn't blame her if she wanted to shift the memories of a few days of adventure with a daft, awkward British magizoologist into the past.

He couldn't help but wonder why it was so much more difficult this second time round. Dealing with creatures always came so easily to Newt - but people? He was used to not quite knowing how to interact with people, but Newt had long since become content with never quite fitting in. Newt would happily wrangle with the nastiest Manticore a thousand times over if it meant that he could understand how to make these current interactions less painful for both of them.

It wasn't that long ago that Theseus had asked him to act a little less 'like himself' during that ministry meeting, and Newt had easily shot him down. Now, a mere day later, he found himself wishing that he had a fraction of Theseus's confidence.

Newt wanted desperately to tell her how he felt and clear up the waters, but due to the delicate nature of their mission, he couldn't risk exposing their facade by making conversation like this in such a public place. And so, Newt was left to dwell in his thoughts, knowing that the most important woman in his life was beside him, and probably only there because she had to be.

"Puis-je vous aider?" Newt was abruptly brought back to reality by the question coming from the witch at the desk. Well, it sounded like a question. His French was a little rusty. Realising rather belatedly that he'd need a backstory, Newt hurriedly introduced Tina as the first ministry-approved persona that popped into his head.

"Er, yes. This is Leta Lestrange." he introduced, in a voice that seemed reasonably believable, if not a bit rushed.

Newt reasoned that it would be best if they simply impersonated his brother and his fiancé. After all, it was best to not stray too far from the truth when it came to a cover up. They were there for Leta's records as well, so it would make most sense if 'Leta' was the one accessing them. A rather practical plan, if he said so himself. Newt ruefully noted that he seemed to have far too much experience when it came to making disguises lately.

The witch didn't look particularly convinced at this however, and Newt quickly realised that he'd need to follow up with more.

"And I'm her…" Newt began, but halfway through, he realised that he couldn't finish the sentence. How could he logically explain why he was here with 'Leta'? Perhaps he could continue on with the guise of his brother again? Would that mean that Tina had to be… his fiancé? That word sounded so hopelessly wrong to his ears, given the situation, and Newt racked his brains for any lie other than that.

Tina chose this moment to break in, vocalising the last thing Newt wanted to hear out loud. "Fiancé," she finished, with a small smile. Newt may have been imagining it, but her voice sounded a little strained.

While Newt had to admire her quick wit, the mention of it from her lips wasn't something he was particularly keen to hear. As if the tension wasn't bad enough already, now they had this disguise to rub the fact that Tina was seeing someone else into Newt's face. He started to wish that he was battling that imaginary manticore.

Still, despite how Newt was feeling, he knew this wasn't the time to bring it up with Tina. Not when an already suspicious foreign Ministry employee was pondering whether to let them into heavily-protected archives.

After what felt like a lifetime to Newt, the wizened face of the old witch gave a small smile and beckoned them inside with a brief French instruction.

Newt barely processed as they gave the witch a polite thanks and hurried inside. Now that they were inside safely, his mind had turned back to that ridiculous engagement business, and Newt resolved to attempt to clear it up at once.

Behind the desk was the entrance into the records room, and for a moment Tina and Newt stood obscured in darkness while they wait for the elaborately carved gates behind them to close. Newt took a moment to contemplate why it was always such a complicated process to access so much of the world's information, and realised that this may be his chance to set his story straight.

"Tina, about that fiancé business…", Newt began tentatively.

"Sorry, yeah. I should have congratulated you!"

Newt didn't think he had ever wanted a congratulations less in his life.

"No, that's-"

Newt's interjection was interrupted by the clanging of the doors closing behind them, followed by Tina immediately filling the silence with a whispered "Lumos". Illuminated before them was what seemed like a seemingly endless forest of shelves, their organic wooden forms curving elegantly up to the ceiling. They had finally reached the records room.

"Lestrange", Tina stated her query to the carnervous room, doggedly continuing their mission before Newt could get another word in. When they were greeted with silence, Newt and Tina began cautiously weaving their way through the shelves, searching for the elusive Lestrange file.

"Tina, about Leta-" Newt tried again.

"Yes, I've just said, I'm happy for you!"

Newt was dismayed to hear the irritation in her tone. She was getting annoyed, and Newt couldn't help but feel frustrated at the turn this conversation had taken. Couldn't she _see_? There was no use feeling happy for him, because it was a non-existent engagement! Frustrated with his inability to tell Tina this simple fact, Newt forced himself to continue.

"Yeah, well, please don't be happy!"

Tina halted her purposeful pace and looked at him like he had just cast a Confundus charm on her. With despair, Newt realised that he had just given quite the opposite impression to what he had intended. He quickly backtracked.

"Uh, no, no. I'm sorry. I don't... Uh, obviously, I...Obviously I want you to be. And I hear that you are now. Uh, which is wonderful. Sorry-"

Newt became more and more uncomfortable as his words tangled up amongst themselves, with his brain refusing to get his emotions out in any way that was remotely cohesive. And the more flustered he got, the harder it became to think straight. It was a vicious cycle, Newt grimly noted. To make matters worse, in his muddled state, he somehow managed to drop his wand on the floor, and had to quickly bend down to retrieve it. Could this day get any worse?

"What I'm trying to say is, I want you to be happy, but don't be happy that I'm happy."

Newt could see Tina's eyes widening in confusion, and then narrowing, and he knew he was rambling, but he forced himself to keep going with this tangled thread, because this may be his only chance to talk to Tina, and by Merlin, he was not about to blow it.

"...because I'm not..."

Merlin, why was this so difficult? Why did his entire vocabulary always seem to disappear at the best of times?

"Happy." Newt finished, somewhat lamely.

Newt wanted to facepalm himself. He hadn't helped the situation at all. He returned his gaze to Tina's, and saw that her dark brown eyes were now meeting his, abandoning all pretenses of being focussed on the mission at hand. Humans were always so much harder to read than creatures, Newt noted. He couldn't make hide nor hair of the expression in her dark eyes, and he only knew that she was waiting for him to continue.

"Or engaged." Newt added, finally able to summon the words that he had been trying to say all along.

"What?"

There was a pause that felt like a lifetime as Tina processed this. Newt had finally gotten that ridiculous clarification off his chest, and the rest of the words that had been circling in his head came tumbling out in a big rush.

"It was a mistake in a stupid magazine. My brother's marrying Leta, June the sixth. I'm supposed to be best man. Which is sort of mildly hilarious."

"Does he think you're here to win her back?" Tina asked seriously, her face betraying none of her emotion.

Newt blinked at the absurdity of that question. What on earth had possessed her to think that? Of course he wasn't. However, Tina misinterpreted his silence as a confirmation of the answer neither of them wanted to hear, and Newt quickly realised his mistake.

"_Are_ you here to win her back?" she followed up with narrowed eyes, taking a step closer.

"No!" Newt immediately retaliated, and with a strength he didn't know he had, Newt raised his chin and met Tina's eyes with all the sincerity that he had.

"I'm here to-

Newt broke off. At that moment, looking into Tina's eyes, it all became clear. Leta was never the point. Newt had come to Paris to see Tina, and Tina alone.

Of course, there were other motivations. Albus Dumbledore, a man he had respected since his Hogwarts days, had asked him to go to France to find Creedence and help him before a less noble crowd could. His brother had wanted him to do the same; not that Newt was particularly inclined to operate on Ministry terms. Newt still felt a pang of guilt and sadness whenever he thought about Creedence and how he had been mistreated over his lifetime. Still, Newt was reluctant to break his travel ban to get involved in what was potentially another political mess on an international scale. Like always, he'd much prefer to keep to the sidelines.

However, once he learnt that _Tina_ was there, only a short portkey over the English channel, all of his objections went out the window. After months of not speaking, Newt knew this was his chance to see her, and even if she didn't want to see him again, he needed to set things straight. Newt came here to see the blaze in Tina's eyes once more. And right now, these fiery eyes were directly in his line of sight… They really did remind him of a salamander. They were staring at him questioningly, and although Newt distantly recalled that she had just asked a question, suddenly all he could think about were her _eyes_.

Newt knew he was staring, but he was on a roll. He didn't even think, he just needed to share more of his emotions with Tina before it was too late, and tell her how beautiful he thought her eyes were...

"You know, your eyes really are-" he trailed off. As he was about to finish, he remembered Jacob's warnings against saying the exact thing he was about to say. He wasn't supposed to finish that sentence.

Newt had always found it difficult making friends, but in Jacob he had found a kind, non-judgemental soul who never made Newt feel like there was something wrong with him. He was one of the few souls that wouldn't roll their eyes when he started rambling, or told him that he was weird and annoying. He even gave Newt advice when he had hesitantly asked what he should say to Tina when he saw her again. He made it sound so easy.

Plus, Newt knew for a fact that Jacob was infinitely better at expressing his feelings, so Newt trusted his advice. He never seemed to make people uncomfortable or frustrated when he spoke. To Newt, he could only look on wonder when Jacob interacted with people, and wonder how on earth he made it look so easy.

Merlin's beard, Jacob had been _obliviated_ and he still managed to get together with Queenie again! If that wasn't a good indication of Jacob's people skills, Newt didn't know what was. With Newt's relationship with Tina already treading on thin ice, he was happy to take all of the advice that he could get.

He hurriedly tried to think back to that conversation. He couldn't leave Tina hanging on a compliment cut short. What had Jacob told him to say? Maybe he should use another creature in his comparison instead? Jacob had told him that it was best not to plan these things, but Newt found himself wishing Jacob had given him explicit step-by step instructions.

Time was ticking, and Tina was still waiting for the end of that sentence. Newt frantically racked his brain for another analogy for her eyes to finish off, but nothing seemed to be half as good. It was useless, all Newt could think of were salamanders. He couldn't help it, that's just what her eyes looked like!

"Are what?", Tina timidly asked, daring to allow a small smile to grace her features.

Newt internally winced. He was trapped. As much as he wanted to detail exactly what he thought of her eyes, he couldn't continue. He simply couldn't think of an alternate way to end that sentence, and now Tina was just going to think that he was crazy.

"I'm not supposed to say."

There was a brief silence as both parties pondered the somewhat lackluster ending, with Tina a little bewildered by the sudden halt in Newt's compliment. Even Newt knew that he had just given the most unsatisfying compliment in wizarding history. He desperately tried to think of something he could say to make up for his blunder.

Oh! The picture of her! Of course! Newt mentally kicked himself for not remembering sooner. Newt had been carrying around a much treasured photo of Tina for almost a year, and perhaps having the photo out in front of him would inspire him into saying something less baffling. And even if that didn't work, then perhaps Tina would be happy to learn that he had a picture of her.

Not long after Newt had left New York, there had been a small piece in the newspaper detailing Tina's reinstatement as an auror. To most people, but Newt knew how much that position meant to Tina. Whatever he might think about aurors in general, Tina was different, and he couldn't picture anyone else who would fit that job better. He wished all aurors would take a leaf out of her book.

She had sent the article to him, back when they were still in contact, and he had treasured that small, crumpled piece of newspaper, and the small photo of Tina in the article. Their time together in New York had been so brief, and Newt regretted that he didn't have more to remember her by. And so Newt did the only thing he could think of - he carefully cut the photo out of the paper, and put it in the lid of his ever-present suitcase, so that he could look at her every time he went into the case. If he knew he was going to be away from his case for a while, he would often take the photo and carefully tuck it into his breast pocket, keeping it close to his heart.

It was a lovely photograph of her. Much like Newt, Tina was not the kind of person who smiled often, but her excitement at being an auror again bled through the black and white ink, and Newt was treated to that happiness every time he carefully unfolded it. She looked so happy in the photo, and Newt's eyes softened whenever he got to view her sparkling smile.

He desperately hoped she would take it well. Newt resolved to procure the photograph, but as he began speaking, Tina seemed to have the same thought, and they both spoke at the same time.

"Newt, I read your book, and did you-"

"I still have a picture of you-", Newt abruptly stopped. Still mid-sentence, Newt's mind was already backtracking to Tina's words had said at the same time as him. Hang on, had she read his book?

"Wait, did you read-" Newt asked with trepidation, touched that she would bother to read it. Perhaps she hadn't forgotten him after all. His mouth opened, but the words wouldn't come. He was touched that despite everything, she had still read his book.

"I got this - I mean, it's just a picture of you from the paper..."

Newt reached into his breast pocket and pulled out the much treasured photo of Tina that had been travelling close to his heart for almost a year now. He tried not to think of how much his hands were shaking from his nervousness. He had never shown it to anyone before, and Newt was apprehensive to bare what felt like one of his deepest secrets, to no less than the subject of that secret. Still, no matter how much he wanted to respond to her previous revelation, he needed to show her that photograph. Newt took a deep breath, and nervously looked up from the photograph to the real thing.

"But it's interesting, because your eyes in newsprint…" Again, Newt racked his brains for the tiniest shred of a sentence, just any way that he could vocalise the emotions he felt towards the breathtaking witch in front of him. Tina still hadn't moved, and Newt could almost feel the intangible tension between them in the air.

Her eyes, which lately had spent far too much time avoiding his gaze had finally softened, and he wasn't sure if he was improving the situation or not, but it was as if he had opened a floodgate in his mind, and he couldn't help but keep going.

"…See, in reality they have this effect in them, Tina… it's like fire in water, in dark water. I've only ever seen that-"

Newt was back to square one. Back at the salamander conundrum. Was he cursed to just talk in circles?

"I've only ever seen that in-" Newt tried again. It was useless. It was like his tongue wasn't working. Merlin, it was like his entire brain wasn't working. He didn't know where to look, he wanted to look at Tina, but making eye contact was nerve-wracking enough at the best of times, let alone when it was with-

Newt was abruptly pulled from his reverie by a single softly spoken word.

"Salamanders?"

Incredulously, and with a sense of hope that he had scarcely allowed himself to have, Newt looked up, only to see a beautiful smiles gracing her features. For this brief, wonderful moment, Newt finally felt understood.


End file.
